Tuesday, July 14, 2015

S - Suitors, Suitors, Everywhere...

People, the Internet is a damp, dark place for anyone, but when it comes to online dating, it is a crevasse of insanity, sadness, and desperation. It is no place for someone who wants to keep a positive outlook on society or the male species. (I am sure the women aren't great either, but this is my blog post so my perspective.)

I went on my first Match.com date on Wednesday. What a doozy. This gentleman knows about the blog, and it's not my intention to hurt anyone's feelings, but we were not a match. I'm sure he'd agree. The date was over within an hour. That's usually not a good sign. He asked a few times what I'd write about him, but I cannot answer such questions. It was not the most pleasant experience for a plethora of reasons. Then I heard that a friend of mine went out with this same man and had a similar experience. Let's just say he is a complainer. He didn't like the restaurant I picked, the air made his eyes itch, and did he mention that he REALLY didn't like the restaurant I picked? On to the next.

I then had a coffee date with an extremely tanned and heavily cologned man. Coffee dates are the worst. They never amount to anything. He was nice enough but a bit of a mansplainer. Not my guy.

At this point I'm super depressed and sad. Internet dating sucks. Everyone is 10-20 years older than I am and seems to want to fit me into some box that they have decided would make a perfect mate. Then I received this:

It was like an omen from the the heavens. I was obviously disappointed that I spent money on this endeavor, but I felt the horoscope gods were telling me to move on. The only problem was that I had already scheduled a date with a gentleman caller that was age appropriate and handsome. I thought, "I'll go out with this one, and then I'm done."

I met Prince (because he is one at this point, and it's fun to say I'm hanging out with Prince) at a local restaurant. He's cute, personable, funny, and most importantly, NORMAL. Our date lasted 3+ hours and probably would have continued if I didn't have work the next day. We're seeing each other again on Friday.

So, let's climb aboard the Love Train once again. Where will this one take us? A make-out? A short relationship with a heartbreak at the end? A fight? Signatures on a dotted line? Only time will tell. 


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