P- Nancy Drew and the Case of the Date-not-Date

So guys, tonight was my date! Because I'm one to (respectfully yet honestly) dish a little bit, here are the details:

We made plans to meet around 845. I was tutoring on the other side of the city and was called into an impromptu "parent meeting" after the session ended at 815. I didn't end up leaving until 830. I sent the guy- let's call him Party Date, since we met at a party- a text and said that I was running late and that he shouldn't rush to get there.

Of course, low and behold, what Google Maps told me was going to be a 42 minute drive turned into a 26 minute drive and as I was approaching the restaurant, Party sent me a text that asked, "should I start driving?" Needless to say, I was already seated, first glass of Chardonnay in hand, when he arrived about 25 minutes later. Normally, I'm a stickler for promptness, but because I had rearranged the timing, I wasn't mad in the least and actually spent the downtime reading up on the Muslim Brotherhood for a lesson I'm teaching tomorrow. Gotta stay sharp. Plus, it's an interesting bunch to investigate....

So, Party arrived, apologized for being late, (which I, of course, excused) and we decided on some noshes and he ordered a drink. As we waited for the oysters to arrive for the first course, we had some nice, "getting to know you" conversation. I tend to talk a lot, so I assume that I monopolized the chat a little bit. But, being self-aware, I made sure to ask him questions. Normally, if I'm bored, I don't even bother, I just keep talking because I know that anything that I'm about to say is going to interest me far more than some drivel that I don't care about. But, he's well spoken and intelligent and telling me things about his life that are interesting. So, I'm intrigued. I'm thinking- "Wow, this is going pretty well!" After all, we only met at a party where we'd both been drinking and didn't really talk that much. We'd exchanged a Facebook message and a few texts, but that's it. (I didn't tell you that before, but, you're welcome.) I'm thinking, "This is a guy I would totally be into getting to know more".

We finished the oysters and started on the main course and the conversation stopped for a minute. As we spooned poutine onto our plates (because we shared dishes, we're not savages) he said, "So, I should tell you something..." which, as we know, is never a good sign.

I'm wasn't what he was going to say, because I had no reason to think one way or another, unless he'd said, "YOU TALK TOO MUCH!" But, instead, he proceeded to tell me that he is in a long distance relationship. The details of such matters don't really matter for the blog purposes. After he told me what was going on, he said, "And then I read your blog post, so I wanted to make sure everything was out there.... You're a good writer". I answered, "I know," (because I am a good writer) and followed up with, "We have another reader!!".... But seriously,  what does one say after such a reveal?

I wasn't mad. Had we been on a 17th date and I heard this, I'd have been none-too-pleased. But, we were having dinner for the first time. And, I actually really appreciated the open-ness and honest-ness. Our conversation continued and we discussed his situation and I gave a few antidotes from my own experiences. After a bit more talking, I told him, "You know that I'm going to write about this..." and he said, "Really??" I reassured him that, yes, I was going to write about the night; because it's part of the deal here, but not in a negative way- because there was no negative. I actually had a good time.

I had a nice dinner with a really nice guy, who has a boyfriend. It was a date-not-date. And I'm OK with that. It's always nice to connect with a new person- especially as a gay in LA. I don't have a lot of gay friends here, so spending time with someone where I actually don't wish to gain back my timea afterward, is a great thing. My interest in him was definitely increased after spending some one-on-one time together. I'm totally up for hanging out again.

But, in the end, no bachelor got a rose from the bachelor....Turns out, the idea of "hanging out," actually meant "hanging out"! You crafty gays...

In the meantime, the AmatingRace continues... I'm back to square one... Do I need to check-in with the Amy's again?